ABD Chapter 30 notes

posted at:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5846625/30

http://www.thewriterscoffeeshop.com/ - Chapter 30

https://sites.google.com/site/dariachenowith/abd/chapter-30

Unfortunately I had to skip a week - sorry for that, if you want to know the reason for it, more below. Also, I got a few reviews and comments in the last weeks full of concern for Bella, and I think it's time that I explain a few things a little more to alleviate your fears.

If you were wondering about how B was tied up in the second part of the scene - I didn't find a better pic (using cuffs instead of rope), but this about aligns all limbs about the same way. It's just a little worse with less distance between ankles and wrists as it puts more strain on pretty much every muscle in the whole body.

Thank you all for your patience, I really didn't intend to stop my intended non-stop posting spree, but life got in the way. My skiing trip was awesome (thanks everyone who wished me a good one, btw!), but I had next to no internet connection, and the last day my laptop killed itself, too, and as if that hadn't been enough I forgot to send chapter 30 to my beta before I went on vacation. Then my summer semester at university started with a lot more stress and things to do than I expected, and, well, it was Friday by the time I had enough energy left to start with my beta edits. I hope that won't happen again, but if it does, please know it's not because I'm lazy but completely overworked. Hey, I even gave up my zynga game addiction on facebook, please see that as a sign of faith in my dedication ;)

Now to the main point of my note - Bella.
I don't want to single out any comments I got, but a lot of you were something between cautious and anxious for her, and I feel like it's my responsibility to set a few things straight (both to alleviate your fears, and to point out that Bella doesn't need anyone to 'protect' her).

I guess by now it's apparent that while there's a break between HBR and ABD, both to skip three months and to switch POVs, it's all one story with a few continuous themes. One of them is Bella's journey of finding herself. It was for the most part the main theme of HBR, but while Edward's own journey of acceptance has taken precedence now (because it's his POV, mainly), it's still one of the plot and character development driving parts of the story.

My pre-readers and I often joke of late how proud we are of the three of them, but I personally think Bella has come the farthest from the somewhat shy, repressed girl she's been a year ago (in-story). Unlike Edward (who usually needs ages and someone to slap sense into him) she is quick to accept changes, and compared to Jazz open to new things. She and Edward both floundered around a bit at the beginning of their relationship - for her the whole BDSM lifestyle was new and as exciting as it was frightening, while he had to get used to actually having a relationship for the first time in his life, which included playing with someone he genuinely loved. Eventually she found her stride, and while some things in ABD made her question herself, she overcame her own insecurities. She accepted her own submissive side, learned to be comfortable with it and wouldn't want to go back to vanilla relationship again. Edward might still have more experience than her, but as far as knowing their limits and being comfortable with them goes, they are equals now.

That also means that Bella wouldn't hesitate to speak up if something was rubbing her the wrong way, long before it could start screwing with her head and really upset her. Edward knows that she wouldn't say she is okay with something unless she really was - you shouldn't doubt her conviction, either.

I know that in every relationship you have to compromise, and every partner has to work hard on keeping the balance between their own needs and what they feel comfortable compromising on. The beauty of a kinky relationship is that you don't have to guess and compromise as much as most of you probably do every single day in your lives. In fact, I'd even go so far to say that the submissive in particular is a need driven, egoistical being that doesn't compromise and only does what they want. Don't forget, the sub's limits are what the Dom is working with - any 'order' a Dom gives that sounds like a forced command is within those limits, within the sub's comfort zone. The sub wants to be barked at, humiliated, made to do something they would probably not do out of their own will because modesty dictates one should not want to do that - but any single moment something goes beyond what they want to do, they can (and have to, in fact) end it by using their safe word. It's the fundamental law that makes playing and power exchange possible - and it's always a two-fold thing; one layer is what things appear to be, and the other is what they really are.

If you're used to working that way with playing, it's easy to conduct business outside of the playroom in a similar fashion. It's a beautiful mix of trust and honesty that I think everyone should thrive for in any kind of relationship - I wouldn't want to live in a web of lies and pretending to be happy when I'm not. And in this aspect I'm writing my own conviction into my characters. Both Bella and Edward would need a really good reason not to be open with each other, and very likely realize the other was lying to them if they were because they are so used to reading each other well. Trust them when they have a heart-to-heart talk, and don't insult them by assuming they are lying when they assure each other that they are okay with something.

I know that some people have problems with relationships that involve more than two people, in whatever kind of relationship they are towards each other. You know that I'm preaching acceptance with my story - if you have real troubles accepting that, you might want to slink away quietly now before I keep offending your moral code any more. A couple are two people, I fully agree on that - when it's three people, it's not a couple anymore, but that can be a wonderful thing, too. It just gets assigned another name ;)